WTF Moments In Awards

Obama Wins Nobel Peace Prize

It’s like some surreal joke, but President Obama has won the Nobel Peace Prize. This is perhaps the first time the Nobel Peace Prize has been awarded to somebody who is about to possibly send 40,000 troops – even if it’s only to Afghanistan, but you know what I mean.

OSLO – President Barack Obama won the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize on Friday for “his extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples,” the Norwegian Nobel Committee said, citing his outreach to the Muslim world and attempts to curb nuclear proliferation.

The stunning choice made Obama the third sitting U.S. president to win the Nobel Peace Prize and shocked Nobel observers because Obama took office less than two weeks before the Feb. 1 nomination deadline. Obama’s name had been mentioned in speculation before the award but many Nobel watchers believed it was too early to award the president.

Speculation had focused on Zimbabwe’s Prime Minister Morgan Tsvangirai, a Colombian senator and a Chinese dissident, along with an Afghan woman’s rights activist.

The Nobel committee praised Obama’s creation of “a new climate in international politics” and said he had returned multilateral diplomacy and institutions like the U.N. to the center of the world stage. The plaudit appeared to be a slap at President George W. Bush from a committee that harshly criticized Obama’s predecessor for resorting to largely unilateral military action in the wake of the Sept. 11 terror attacks.

Rather than recognizing concrete achievement, the 2009 prize appeared intended to support initiatives that have yet to bear fruit: reducing the world stock of nuclear arms, easing American conflicts with Muslim nations and strengthening the U.S. role in combating climate change.

“Only very rarely has a person to the same extent as Obama captured the world’s attention and given its people hope for a better future,” Thorbjoern Jagland, chairman of the Nobel Committee said. “In the past year Obama has been a key person for important initiatives in the U.N. for nuclear disarmament and to set a completely new agenda for the Muslim world and East-West relations.”

He added that the committee endorsed “Obama’s appeal that ‘Now is the time for all of us to take our share of responsibility for a global response to global challenges.'”

I think what they’re trying to say is they really, really, really like him and wish that he could be the President of the whole damn planet. I mean, I like the guy too, but isn’t it still a little early in the game?

My Personal Take On Drivers of Black BMWs

You’re all a pack of aggressive assholes and cunts. When I’m the Dear-Leader-Dictator of The Whole World, I am going to make sure I create an extermination camp specifically for people who own and drive Black BMWs. Yes, I am going to exterminate all of you Black-BMW-driving fuck-knuckle cunt-juice garglers!

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